I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
3pm strippers are depressing
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
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