yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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