glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
