It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
