I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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