I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
