when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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