Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Do vagina's smell?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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