I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I forgot how hot balto sounded
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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