i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
