New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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