my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
this hospital has no fireball
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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