no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
