At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
