yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
