Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I have demons in me.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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