We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
That reminds me...we need to get swords
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
