How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
