OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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