i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
