he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
