Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I have aggressive nipples.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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