Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
