I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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