that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
You took a bar mat shot.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
