awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
