My hair reeks of homosexuality.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize