Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize