Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
