you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
