but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
