but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Randomize