yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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