Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
