HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
