is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
