she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize