fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize