come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
