jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
