After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize