Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
