is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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