every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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