I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Randomize
