I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
