Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She's just so happy...and so naked.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
