Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize