I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
