right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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