I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Redeem this text for a blowjob
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I have feelings that need drinking.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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