it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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