Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Randomize
